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Home of the Dead 4 (Deja Menollie)
1922-1993 | Serious, Drama | 2 comments
1922-1993 felt drained, I mean, his condition was increasingly awful and extremely sexual. We thought some good old-fashioned elbow grease might send a lightning bolt of hatred through his heart of sickness, so I drew up blue-prints for a dog house and we hit the grindstone, hats but no pants. I drilled two three quarter inch holes in Patrick's chest; where his nipples once was - where his vagina once were. Next, thrice parts copper tubing - inserted strongly in the butthole (to be no more ...
The Tear Jerker
Lash Leroux | Ridiculous!, Horror | 2 comments
Archie Farchy made his living / Digging graves for fifty years. / For fifty years he filled those holes. / The Man Who Caused a Million Tears. / He touched boys of many ages / In a cave of many secrets. / Farchy took their fucking souls. / For fifty years he filled those holes. / He still has their fucking souls. / The Man Who Caused a Million Tears...
Home of the Dead 4 (A Chapter in Loss)
1922-1993 | Serious, Drama | 3 comments
On Monday morning around 3am, 1922-1993 was standing at the foot of my bed (which was a plastic racecar), reading from his book of original proverbs. / "Live now/create (remember that's "slash create," you little fuck), for soon your memory will be erased like a stepchild's artwork," Patrick preached in a baritone register. "Do not forsake the bake - pastry is tasty...thus, the lonely baker holds most of the secrets." / One good philosophical load of shit ...
Legend of the Cactus Fondler.
Mullanaphy! | Ridiculous!, Comedy, Drama | 1 comment
"Caught at last Mr. Cactus Fondler!" / Now I know what you're thinking, Mr. Cactus Fondler isn't the most charming of nicknames. Unfortunately in this case it rings true. ­You see I'm a traveling man. My main companion is the cold desert nights, and the cold nights can't warm you in the right way if you catch my drift. / Sure, traveling is great but sometimes a man must let his carnal needs run rampant. So I've enjoyed the rough prickly feel ...
Home of the Dead 4 (The Potato Famine)
1922-1993 | Serious, Drama | 2 comments
I woke up as an irish boxer, rising and falling/triumph blah blah, so I changed all the outlet covers in the house; that's known as an update, jazzbreath, and it was a chore with those green boxing gloves getting in the way. 1922-1993 was smitten, like, totally fucking naked, thumb-tacking his bean bag to a sesame seed bun (his bun, a.k.a. his own ass, for lent). I was like, "whatevs," while I wiped the sesame seeds off his old/poorly tattooed/over tattooed/miserable rear-end (everyone knows ...
Some poems to break the silence
Mullanaphy! | Ridiculous!, Action, Comedy | 5 comments
The Hat: / I saw the dragon, / wearing the yellow hat, / I'd hate to be bragging, / but I ate the cat. / Showering\Touching: / My body is naked, / all muscled and bronzed, / the water is rusted, / and so are my palms. / Body awake: / My eyes are throbbing, / my heart is beating, / my head is pounding, / and my groin is bleeding. / Love Sonata #2: / Your scleras are tight, / perfectly white, / Your pupils are blue, / So I'm gonna bang you. / Love Sonata #17: / I don't have an ...
Silent But Deadly...
Lash Leroux | Ridiculous!, Action | 2 comments
I am a stealth assassin. As I creep through the reeds, clad entirely in black, you would think I was a black hole on wheels or a very quiet elk or something. As I approach my target, I pause to avoid being detected by the sound of my heart. I coax that fist of cardio muscle into a lull with some soothing talk. "Don't worry, baby. I've got a few hundred milligrams of sodium for you when this is all said and done. Shhh, baby." I put my finger to my throat. I never could feel my own ...
Home of the Dead 4 (Shorty with no Patrick)
1922-1993 | Serious, Sci-Fi | 0 comments
Last month in the forest, I spotted a dead body. She was cold, but her tits were frostbitten and half-eaten. "So," I says, "what's a girl like you doing with a face like that?" She looked at me blankly. I looked deep into her eye sockets, wondering who stole her eyes. The urge to purge came over me like a 60 foot redwood crashing through a camp cabin full of 1st graders. "Timber!" I yelled as I drained 4 kettles of piss into her ocular abyss. Next time she'll remember to leave a trail ...
Breakin' Down the Wall of Fame
1922-1993 | Serious, Action | 0 comments
Makin' waves, it's all about makin' waves. That's what I do. I create an epic force in order to keep things running smoothly. In my line of work, you have to realize something - people are afraid of change. That's why I take strides, baby. That's why I make decisions. Big decisions. Like rearranging the storage room. Like moving the eight foot tables, or, as I've been known to call them, "the perfect sized tables for buttsex," like taking those ...
Home of the Dead 4 (Reinhard Tasty)
1922-1993 | Serious, Mystery | 1 comment
Feeling like a wretched spawn/useless victim, I took it upon myself to make 1922-1993 the supper of a lifetime. I started by washing my filthy hands, only to molest four children in a row, vigorously. Without missing a beat, I added a cup and a half of half and half, plus one entire bag of stale, shitty sour cream and onions. / "Out of my kitchen, you fucking coward!" I screamed. "You'll ruin my roast." Patrick was peeking, and I was in no mood for tricks (or dicks), so I jammed ...