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Heavenly Pelvis
By Lash Leroux at 2007-11-08 | Ridiculous!, Romance | Printable version
Last night I had the best make-up sex of my life. I wore lipstick and eye liner, and my wife went crazy with blush. Actually, she just used the lipstick to paint two red circles on her cheeks. It was incredible.
We had just gotten over our latest fight. It was our worst to date. Things were said that will never be undone. She called me a jerk and I said she meant "less to me than a terd resembling Regis Philbin." I guess we both deserved such harsh words. After all, I did miss our anniversary because I was out all night with one of the hairiest hookers I have ever met in my life.
It was our five-year anniversary: five years since that magical day when I found my blushing bride. I was in my bedroom moshing to Foreigner when I accidentally head-butted a gaping hole into my wall. That is when I found her, stuffed between two beams. She has such lovely bones, especially that tibia. That tibia could resurrect Al Gore and give him a boner...
Posted by Lash Leroux at 2007-11-29
Edit: Dropped the Courier. As hard as it may be, I must accept that this is no longer the Victorian era...
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