Something smells. I woke up sweatier than my dad's balls after a long hard dick at work. Someone turned the heat up and it wasn't me. I'm too freaking short to reach the the thermostat. I open the door slowly and peaked into the hall. My tiny shirmplet peaked too. Just then Dessert Storm rolled out of my shorts. No friendly fire in that soft batch, I thought to myself. I giggled for about five minutes at my Desert Storm joke, then dragged a chair from the kitchen table to thermostat. I looked at it, but the numbers were missing. The chair started to tilt back and forth. I then noticed that I had put one leg on my dog, Saint Dr. Hulkenstein. No one else called him that, but I named him that before they started calling him Gabe. Anyway... The Docter was in, and so was I... trouble that is. Ol' Hulkster stood up and I fell back. Thinking quickly or reacting or whatever, I grabbed onto the thermostat and it ripped off the wall. I fell face first into my sand trap and I was covered in a mess I would later blame on the dog. Gross. I wiped my face on the dog and put the thermostat in his bowl. Fuck you Gabe... Fuck you.
Posted by Anonymous Jerk #17 at 2007-10-17
Dogs suck...
Posted by Lash Leroux at 2007-10-30
I especially appreciate the reference to dad's nads. They were always my favorite...
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